RAINBOW CONNECTIONS

by - Gillian Silverlight

TITLE	RAINBOW CONNECTIONS
AUTHOR	Gillian Silverlight
DISTRIBUTION	My site, TQ and Saber. Others please ask
DISCLAIMER	They belong to Joss and the WB, as well as Jim Henson. I just play with them.
SUMMARY	Spike is drunk and a song sticks in his head.
AUTHOR'S NOTES	Thanks to Patti for the laughs about this idea, and her encouragement to me. This was fun and silly to write. I hope you enjoy it as much as I had very tongue-in-cheek fun writing it.

* There is nothing on this bloody soddin' TV at all! Reduced to watchin' kiddie movies, I am. Oh, bugger it! *

Spike was not a happy vampire that there was nothing on television other than a Muppet movie. He hated the Muppets! * But the pig loves the soddin' frog. Why can't the Slayer love a vampire other than the poof? *

Needless to say, Spike was on his third bottle of Jack Daniels that afternoon. He'd started drinking much earlier in the day; so early it had been last night. Then to add insult to injury, the frog started to sing!

Spike held his head in his hands at the agony of it all.

**************************************

The movie from earlier had finally gone off, but the blonde vampire couldn't get the song out of his head, but keep going round and round and round, like a carousel. Well, he'd had enough! He wanted to get off this ride!

The sun had finally set, and the very inebriated vampire staged outside his crypt to fall on his back. * Think I'll lay here. Can't fall anymore if I stay on the ground. Bloody frog, still singin' in my 'ead. Maybe finally going mad like Dru....*

*That's it, bloody Slayer finally has driven me bloody mad, she has. Won't talk to me, shut me out. Love the stupid chit. Can't see that can see? Oh no, I'm not Angel... not my bloody poof of a sire, don't have a bloody soul. *

Spike lay there, drinking occasionally from his fourth bottle of JD, which was almost empty.
He started to softly sing the words that hadn't left his head all day.

'Why are there so many songs about rainbows
And what's on the other side
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions
And rainbows have nothing to hide
So we've been told and some choose to believe it,
I know their wrong, wait and see'

Spike hadn't seen a rainbow since he last saw the sun. What was it about them? Yeah, he guessed they were pretty in a sissy kinda way. He'd never paid much attention to them before. * What IS on the other side of the rainbow? Is it really a weird land with green cities and green witches? Red's not green.. Red is.. Well, red! Rainbow couldn't 'ide anything anyway.. Can see right bloody through it. Wish the Slayer could see through me. I got nothing to 'ide. Told her everything, I did. I'd give 'er the world, stupid chit. *

*Not much more weird than a vampire in love with a Slayer. Me, the Big, Bad... 'How the mighty 'ave fallen. *

Spike looked around him, the ground seemed awfully close.. * Oh yeah! I fell down! That's me.. Fallen.. Fallen on the ground, fallen for the Slayer..*

'Some day we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
The lovers, the dreams and me.

Who said that every wish would be heard and answered
When wished on the morning star
Somebody thought of that, and someone believed it
Look what it's done so far
What's so amazing, that keeps us star-gazing
And what do we think we might see'

*That's me.. A lover, a dreamer.. Dream of the Slayer. Gets in my 'ead, can't get her out. Got in my 'eart too. Never wished on the morning star.. Maybe I should, maybe it'd help
All it's done so far is make 'er lock me out, yell at me, turn the Scoobies against me. Didn't like them anyway. *

*I see the stars... kinda pretty. Don't look at the stars. Dru always listened to them. Must 'ave made me crazy too. *

* 'ey! Don't the Slayer have a frog? Got a pig.. Maybe she's got a frog too... *

Spike staggered to his feet, clutching his bottle. He made his way very precariously down the street to Buffy's house.

It was a good thing no one was around to see him trying to climb the tree up to her window. He dangled upside down, sideways, and never spilled a drop. Finally he made his way to the roof and the Slayer's window. Looking through it, he could see her pig on the bed. On the self across the room, he spotted that obnoxious green frog..

* Damn, that's why 'es in my 'ead. 'e lives in her room. Should have known it. Can't get to him to talk to him. Maybe he'll 'ear me from out 'ere. *

" 'ey you! Frog.. Wanna get this bleeding song out of me 'ead now? Making me as crazy as Dru, craze as the Slayer makes me."

Spike was yelling at the stuffed Kermit on Buffy's shelf from outside her open window.
Downstairs, Buffy heard the noise and headed up the stairs to see what in the world was going on. She found Spike just like that. Drunk, outside the window, yelling at a stuffed toy and singing.. He hadn't seen her in the doorway of her room yet. She leaned on the doorframe and watched the show.

'Some day we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
The lovers, the dreams and me

All of us under its spell
We know that it's probably magick
Have you been half asleep and have you heard voices
I've heard them calling my name
Is this a sleep sound that calls the young sailors
The voice might be one and the same
I've heard it too many times to ignore it
Its something that I'm s'pose to be'

"So tell me frog.. Am I under 'er spell? She get the witch to put a spell on me so I'd love 'er? Knew if I loved 'er she could 'urt me more, I guess."

"D'you 'ear voices? I do sometimes. Always sound like 'er. Says such nice things to me. Why can't she say nice things to my face? Why'd she 'ave to wait until I'm dreaming about 'er?"
"Don't say much, do you froggie? Ya piggie's across the room.. She not speaking to you either?"

Spike lay back on the roof with the empty bottle in his hand. "What am I suppose to be? What does she want me to be? Can't just grow a bloody soul. Don't know if I want on anyway, not if I 'ave to get all broody like that nancy-boy."

'Some day we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
The lovers, the dreams and me
La da da de, da da do
La da da de da da do.'

Spike kept on with the 'la da' part of the song. It made as much sense to him as anything right then.

Buffy was about to fall over from trying not to laugh. She was holding her sides, and turning red in the face. This was priceless. She just wished vampires would show up on videotape so she could blackmail Spike with this later. She imagined the first part of the 'show' had been just as funny.

Finally taking pity on the drunken vampire, she went to the window. He couldn't stay all night on her roof; she'd never get any sleep fro one thing. Then too, she'd feel guilty if she let him fall off and get hurt or lay there and fry when the sun came up.

Buffy leaned out the window. "Spike, what are you doing there? Why were you talking to my stuffed animals?"

"It's' a Slayer. 'ullo Slayer. I wanted to get the frog to tell me 'ow to find a rainbow connection. He found one and got the pig to love him even if 'e is a frog. Thought if I could find one, you might love me even if I am a vampire."

"I can't see rainbows, you see.. I'm a vampire and the sun will make me go POOF! Don't wanna go POOF! Gotta girl I love.. I need to get 'er to love me. Pig loves the frog, girl should love the vampire. Used to love a vampire, but 'e left 'er. Shhh! Don't tell anyone. Gets 'er upset to talk about that."

"I'd never leave 'er you know."

Buffy leaned on the window ledge. "So, Spike, why do you love this girl if she doesn't love you?"

"Don't know. She 'ates me, beats me up, is always mean to me.. Love her anyway. Don't get to pick who ya love. Just sneaks up on you and bite you in the arse Then you're just love's bitch again."

"Can I come in a talk to tha' froggie? I need to know 'ow to make 'er believe me so's she'll love me. It 'urts so bad 'cause she won't believe me."

Spike started to cry lying there on the roof. Buffy took a deep breath and sighed. * Why me? What did I do to deserve a drunk Spike on my roof, crying because I don't love him? *

She reached out and grabbed his arm, pulling him toward the window. "You better get in here before you fall off the roof."

She had to pull him through the window and even then he fell on the floor. She took the empty bottle away from him and pushed him onto the bed, taking his shoes off.. Spike rolled over and was just as quickly, sleeping or out cold.

Buffy stood looking at the vampire. * When he's not talking, he IS very attractive. I have to admit that. He's got a nice body. Why does he have to be a vampire? I could really go for him if he wasn't.. But he is.. He has no soul, just that chip. He is devoted.. We saw that with him with Dru. Why does he have to be a vamp? Why can't he have a soul if he is?*

Buffy had no answers and wasn't sure why she had the questions. * What was he babbling about frogs and pigs and rainbow connections? Isn't that a song from when I was a kid? *

She went downstairs to look through her old records. Finally after much searching, she found a Muppet album. Sure enough it had a song called 'Rainbow Connections'. There was Kermit and Miss Piggy on the cover. She wondered if that was the frog and pig. Buffy put the old album on the stereo to listen to the song. *Yep. That was it. That's the one he was babbling about. Why was he listening to THAT!? And where? *

Buffy remembered when she used to watch the Muppets when she was younger. None of them were alike. Yet they all got along together. Miss Piggy used to chase Kermit around all the time, yet they finally did get married in one movie. Piggy used to beat Kermit up all the time.. * Does Spike see himself as Kermit and her as Miss Piggy? That wasn't very complementary, but she supposed he was looking at it from the point of them both being so different. She used to believe that differences didn't matter. That was before being Chosen. It was before Angel and Angelus. *

*Spike kept saying he wasn't Angel. He has been different. Maybe kids are right. Maybe differences don't matter that much. *

She ran both hands through her hair in frustration. "OH, Hell. Maybe.... If he can see something in a child's song, maybe there was something good in there. " She headed back up the stairs to check on him. * Yeah and maybe monkeys will fly out of my butt too. *

Spike was still sleeping or out. When she sat carefully on the edge of the bed to look at him. She was deep in thought and didn't see Spike open his eyes. He reached out and put both arms around her, rolling her under him. Before she could get a word out, he'd leaned down and kissed her.

Buffy had both hands on his chest. She kissed him back before she realized what she was doing. It had been a while since she'd been with anyone and he was no slouch at kissing. One arm wound up and around his neck, pulling him closer

He finally broke the kiss. "That was wonderful, luv. Did'ch'a talk to the frog and pig? "

"Spike, you're still drunk."

"Yeah, that I am. But drunk or sober, I love you, Buffy. It never stops, never goes away. Not in the months since I realized it, not since it happened. Even your recent ex saw it and called me on it."

"Riley? He thought you were in love with me?"

"Yeah. Warned me away from you. I can't help how I feel, Buffy. I'd better go now."
He turned her lose and started to stand up, still staggering a bit. She got off the bed right behind him and put a hand on his arm. "Since you're already inside, and drunk.. Let me make you some chocolate to help sober you up a bit."

He looked at her wondering what the catch was.. Seeing nothing lurking in her eyes, he agreed and followed her down the stairs to the kitchen.

"Know how Mom did this? She always did it before."

"Yeah, I watched her when she did. Let me help you, luv."

Buffy looked up at him. She saw affection and longing in his face. "Yeah, Spike. That would be nice."

They made hot chocolate together.

Gillian Silverlight 3/15/01